You Are Not It

It. What is It? Everyone has an It. Some have more than one. (Stay with me here…)

As I sat in church this morning, I was listening to the message as it was speaking directly to my heart. We discussed the Beatitude of Matthew 5:9. Blessed are the peacemakers, for they will be called the children of God.

I then went home and watched Elevation Church online to watch my favorite Pastor preach. Steven Furtick is one of the reasons I found my faith again. He randomly showed up on my Tiktok (full of dancing men and cops) in the middle of my darkest storm. Thoughts of divorce and a realization of how ugly I have been on the inside. The pain I’ve caused others around me because of my own mental state I was ignoring. I bled on those who didn’t cut me. Pastor Steven’s voice was calming and I listened. This is how it went though… Four videos of men dancing topless to popular songs, a couple funny cops, and then Pastor Steven Furtick. Man we’re people confused listening to me watch Tiktok 😂😂

Each sermon today had something that stuck out to me and really touched my heart. If you're not a faith based person, don’t give up on me yet. You can apply this, I promise.

Let’s go back to It. It can be so many things. Sin, transgressions, insecurity, fear, failure, addiction, anxiety, depression, etc. These are things. These are It. We often define ourselves by our It.

YOU. ARE. NOT. IT. Repeat it again… I’ll wait.

When we are alone and it is just us and our thoughts, we define ourselves when we beat ourselves up in silence. Some of us do it out loud to beat others from saying it first. Failed at your marriage? You call yourself a failure. Had an affair? Cheater. Addicted to drugs? Addict. Alcohol? Alcoholic. Pornography? (Omg, did a woman of faith just go there? Sure did) Overweight? Skinny? It is everywhere. As we go through different seasons in our life, It can change. But…


Now what about titles. Those can be an It as well. Police officer, District Manager, CEO, Cashier, Server… you get the hint. Those are all titles and positions we hold when we exchange time for money. Sometimes we get lost in the title and let It define us. I know. I’ve been there. My favorite titles I’ve had are mother & wife. Yet, that wasn’t my first “about me” when introducing myself in the past. I allowed my title to be my defining factor, my worth. That became an obsession to be more and have a bigger title to feed my ego and WOW people with. That obsession led to alcohol usage and unhealthy relationships. It led to Sin, insecurity, and fear.

It is where we run when we are in a dark place. Liquor, pornography, drugs, people we shouldn’t go to, etc. And then inside, we beat ourselves up for doing it. We go deeper into the dark place, use our It, and the cycle continues. Thus creating a repeated pattern that makes it harder to break. Makes you feel weaker and insecure.


For me, turning my It to God and confessing it began to create a peace within myself that I don’t know I’ve ever experienced before. For you, maybe it’s just speaking it out loud. Maybe, it’s a confession to your spouse. Maybe, it’s working with a coach or a counselor. Work daily to create your peace and stick with it… Because you are not It. You are so much more.

Now… Peace… Blessed are the peaceful… Wait no, that’s not how it goes. Blessed are the peaceMAKERS... The people who go and make peace. The people who are so filled with peace through the storm that they overflow their peace onto others. Those people who confessed their It, fought the battle of It, and found a peace that feels so good they overflow it onto others. I cannot stop talking about the peace I’ve found by confessing my sins to God and following Him. Learning the difference between Religion (do) and Faith (it is done). Learning to be quiet and listen to Him. Learning His word and finding me again through it. Doing this journey with my Husband and children. That is my peace.

My people see a different Tanya. A happier, more peaceful Tanya. A peacemaker who wants to help others find their peace and pay it forward. If you're defining yourself by your It, let’s talk. No pressure, no sales pitch, no judging. Email me at with your It and tell me you're ready to fight it and find your peace. I’ll personally respond to each email.

And just in case you need to hear it again…. YOU. ARE. NOT. IT!

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